Desires

Today is a fairly good day even though I continue to spiral downward. What's strange is that last night, I had ripples of numbness coming from the core of my body and expanding all the way to the ends of my nerves. My head also got cloudy and today, I became unsynchronized with my senses and thoughts. It wasn't that bad but it made me uneasy though, something that shouldn't happen. Other than that, I got a project from history, fairly easy to do, and I'm almost done with my English project, just have to print out a picture of Dan White and make the letters of his sin which is murder and suicide. M.S. = Masters in Science XD

There's a place that no one can ever reach without something bad happening to them or that the journey to the place is just to hard. It's the difficulties that have us get pushed away from such a rewarding goal should we have the desire to pursue it. Everyone's desires are different and that is what contributes to our motivations to do something. A desire to make love with anyone means that you have the motivation to fuck with anyone at any time so why not become a porn star while you're at it. There are desires to see to the end of something like a project for school or an individual goal that you want to achieve to make yourself a better person. There are even desires that we share with one another like the desire to get into a good school or a desire to get a good job. Regarding desires for good school and job aren't the same anymore because of the depression that is occurring in America so people are going to school or getting a good job just so that they can survive. Survival is not a desire but a fact. It's either be killed or be the killer.

I have desires of my own which aren't all to big except for a few which happen to be equality amongst everyone and a world in peace. Those are desires huge to achieve since I know I cannot accomplish it on my own no matter how hard I try. Another somewhat large desire is to see people happy and with smiling faces. That is achievable but quite hard to do since this world is full of problems to make the happy faces turn into sad and angry faces. I wonder sometimes whether if what I want to do is worth doing but in my mind, something tells me that it is even if it is hard to achieve easily. With that in mind, I keep moving forwards towards the desires that act like goals because those aren't selfish desires, in my opinion anyways.

Desires are motivators though no one sees it as that. What is the desire that will motivate you to do something?

A world without desire is a world with a mysterious existence. I have found that desire is an essential thing that we need in order to survive in todays capitalist and without that desire, we would not exist very well within society. Competition is a very small part of desire because it is what fuels it to move. I know for one that competition is not apart of my desire at all, it is something that I absolutely refuse to accept.